Monday, August 17, 2009

My Sunday Routine

With the NFL kicking off in just a few weeks, I've begun thinking about what I'm going to do for Sundays. I've also had to try to explain my strict routine to the Significant One so that she knows what to expect on Sundays. I told her that she can either actively participate in the routine and maybe even add one (but no more then two) things to it. So without further ado (?) I give to you: MY SUNDAY ROUTINE.
9:00-9:30 AM- This is the first and toughest part of the whole routine. One, it's Sunday and I don't have to work so I'm not obligated to wake up at all, but I know that I have to get up. I also sometimes have to deal with the night before, depending on if I found something random to celebrate.
9:30-10:15 AM- During this time I pull out my Dallas Cowboys coffee mug and sit on the couch and drink as much coffee as I can (It's going to be a long day). I also pull out the Good Ol' Laptop (GOL) and begin reading every possible thing I can about the days games and fantasy football topics. In my favorites list I have 15 different websites I go to. Also, while I'm sitting there getting my obligatory coffee fix I have the television on a pre-game show. (I actually don't like pre-game shows that much. To me they seem pretty pointless, it really is just a group of guys opinion's on the games. I watch them however, for the breaking news that may come out quicker then on the internet such as ESPN's Chris Mortenson giving the updated injury reports for various teams. I always thought "Mort" was very good at this aspect of his job.).
10:15-10:30 AM- The Triple S.
10:30-10:45 AM- The first crucial ritual of the day. Getting dressed. I have various jerseys to choose from and the selection process is important. It goes in some way, like this:
  • Which jersey will the team be wearing on this day? The Cowboys wear their white home jerseys often so I am often wearing the DeMarcus Ware jersey I covet. (Note: I also have a home Roy Williams #31 jersey. He isn't on the team anymore so I won't have to decide this year which one to wear, whereas I did a few times last year.) Usually, for one game the Cowboys wear their throwback juserseys. I have a Tony Romo jersey for this occasion.
  • Which player am I "feeling" today? If I decide to not worry about which color jersey the team will be wearing I just go with what I feel lucky with. Mostly, I'm feeling Ware and I go with him. But a few times I do feel froggy and decide with the Throwback Tony Romo jersey.
  • Is this the kind of game where I need to summon the Ghosts of Cowboys Past? This is usually reserved for games against the Pittsburgh Steelers, San Francisco 49ers, or a division rival, but sometimes I just want to pull out the Roger Staubach, Troy Aikman, or Emmitt Smith jersey. I miss the days when the 49ers and Cowboys battled every year in the NFC Championship. That was fun! I also still feel very nostalgic when I see the Steelers and Cowboys helmet lined up next to each other.

10:45-10:50 AM- I'm showered, dressed, and on edge from all the coffee. Now it's time to gather up the various Fantasy Football information I have gathered for this weeks matchup (Notes, magazines, newspapers, and the laptop). Also, since I'll most likely be out of the house for the next 12-15 hours I get my Dallas Cowboys mug, hat, and anything else I may need for the day.

10:50-11:00 AM- I am now embarking on a ten minute drive to the local watering establishment to conduct some fantasy business. During this drive I have sports talk radio on the dial but I'm not really listening. My mind is racing. I'm thinking about what I want to do with my various lineups, who am I betting on, what are the lines in the games, and delusions of a Dallas Cowboys victory.

11:00-12:00 PM- I grab a drink when I get to the local watering establishment and sit down with the guys in my fantasy league. Everyone has something to say about last weeks games. Either someone is talking smack about beating a fellow league mates team, or gloating about his favorite teams victory over a hated rival. By the time I sit down, I know exactly what I want to do. I know who I'm starting, who I'm playing against, and who I'm betting for/against. I figured all this out on that 10 minute drive here. It's absolutely CRUCIAL I have this time to myself to collect my thoughts. Finally, everyone settles and we go through free agent pickups, trades, lineup submissions, and trading line-ups with your opponent. This process actually takes some time. All the while, I'm getting text messages and phone calls from friends just wanting to talk about the days action. Most of the time, the last 10-15 minutes are free for me to contact my contact and put in my bets. Over/unders and point spreads are being bet on, and hopefully I won't need the Monday Night game to get myself out of a hole.

12:00-12:15 PM- Fantasy lineups are submitted. Bets are made. All I need to now is to sit down and watch, right? Hardly. I am now on my way to a location where I can watch these games. Sometimes I'll go to a bar and watch but really I only do that on Cowboys bye weeks, so I don't have to put myself in position to fight someone who may or not like what I have to say. So, I'm headed to a buddies house with the NFL Ticket and a fast internet connection. Of course, first I stop at a 7-11 and pick up something to drink and something to eat. (Note: I've been known to get more coffee depending on the strength of the headache).

12:15-1:00 PM- I'm at my buddies house. The next 45 minutes are pretty much the last 45 minutes of the day I get to just sit and relax. I set up the GOL, I get a few other things together, and pour myself a drink in my Dallas Cowboys mug. Pretty much from there until kickoff it's just hanging out, talking, and watching whatever pre-game show is on.

1:00-4:00 PM- Now for the madness. Kick-off time. I'll leave my Dallas Cowboys Game Routine for the 4:00 kick-off. For the first set of games, I'm watching the games involving different aspects.

  • If the team my buddy roots for in on and I am at his house, I am forced to watch that game.
  • The game with the most amount of fantasy players combined are involved with.
  • The best game with the best best matchup.

During the games I'm closely montioring the GOL for fantasy scores and betting scores. I like to try to make it so every game is important, however there are exceptions (Cleveland vs. Oakland, for example. Nothing against the teams but A) they play in the AFC, so they won't affect Dallas' playoff chances and B) right now, they just aren't that good). So if the Cowboys are not playing I'm basically doing just a couple things: 1) Monitoring fantasy scores 2) monitoring betting scores 3) rooting violently against the hated teams (Redskins, Giants, Eagles) or teams that may have an effect on a Cowboys playoff spot.

4:00-4:15 PM (Note: Times are not exact here, it all depends on when first set of games end and the exact kickoff time of the Cowboys)- Before kickoff, I do a quick fantasy score scan, looking to see who needs what to give me a victory, and check the betting scores to see who needs what to give me a victory. I then go fill up my Dallas Cowboys mug with whatever I'm drinking. Then, I turn the television to which ever channel the Dallas Cowboys game is on. Now, before kickoff it's time to step outside for a quick smoke (Note: I HAVE to have all this done by the time the kicker kicks the ball off. NO EXCEPTIONS).

4:15-7:30 PM- Now for the Dallas Cowboys Game Routing.

  • Hopefully, I'm already sitting in the "lucky" spot. If things are going well, I will not move from that seat. I will also become increasingly violent if someone happens to snag that seat in an attempt to get me stressed out. Even though I am reluctant to do it, if things are going bad I will try to find a new seat that may help the Cowboys out.
  • I will NOT speak badly about the other team, especially if there is a fan of that team watching the game with me. I can't have bad karma on my side. So if they make a good play, I blame it on my team. If the other team makes a bad play, I cheer for my team doing a good job not by yelling "HAHA, YOU F****** SUCK!!!" at the other team. I'm trying to be respectful and not have The Football Gods of Karma (which every fan knows about) punish me.
  • I absolutely under no circumstance will smoke during the game. Only at halftime do I permit myself to go outside and smoke. I'm not real sure where this superstition started but I'm pretty sure it was during a Dallas Cowboys vs. Washington Redskins game when I stepped out to smoke and ended up suffering a loss.
  • So, after my halftime smoke I come back inside and empty out the Dallas Cowboys mug. I can no longer drink out of the mug. Only during the the first half. In fact, I can't even drink anything during the second half. It's really annoying. This is actually the one superstition that I have every intention of breaking this year. I think I'm going to work on it during the pre-season. I get thirsty, and I like drinking out of my mug, so I think this little tid-bit needs to come to an end.
  • I have to watch the entire game, no matter what the score is. This isn't so hard when the game is close, or the Cowboys are blowing out the opposition. But, the real test comes when the Cowboys are getting blown out themselves. I do this for self-torture. Plain and simple. I want to feel the pain. I want to remember how it felt when the Cowboys were getting beaten badly. I want to remember the text messages and phone calls from friends who had negative things to say. I do this so that one day, when the Cowboys are again Super Bowl Champions I can think of those horrible losses and all those friends with the negativity and smile at them and relish the championship. (Note: I have failed in this step before. 2008. Week 17, Dallas @ Philadelphia. All they needed to do was win and they were in the playoffs. Instead, they came out and got whooped 44-6. I turned off the game mid-way through the third quarter and went home, and went to bed. All offseason, I have felt guilty for turning my back on the Cowboys. I swear, it will never happen again, no matter how bad it is.)
  • Finally, regardless of the outcome it's reflection time. I go outside to smoke the post-game smoke, and discuss the game with my buddy Kyle, who is a Cowboys fan. After that conversation it's time to talk to various people about the days action. Who won, who loss, how much money did I win/lose, various fantasy happenings, and the game coming up at night. (You didn't think it was over did you?)

7:30-Until the end of Sunday Night Football Game- Whether I'm celebrating a victory or mourning a loss I can sit back and watch the game (Of course unless the Cowboys are playing). It's the only game on so there is no channel flipping or anything. I'm still monitoring fantasy scores, and hopefully I'm not scrambling to make up for any monetary losses. I'll either watch this game at my buddies house, or go home and watch it. All depends on how I'm feeling. If I watched a classic game by the Cowboys that calls for further celebration (Cowboys vs. Bills Monday Night Football 2007), I'll go to a local watering establishment to watch and gloat.

End of Sunday Night Football Game-The moment my eyes close to go to sleep- After all the games are done, fantasy scores are established, and monetary wins/losses are in the books, I'll lay down watch the highlights and post-game reactions on ESPN or NFL Network. I'll do this until I fall asleep. I have to get plenty of sleep, because depending on who is playing on Monday Night Football I may have a long night ahead of me once again.

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